- Granddad: What am I going to do, she's perfect, she's the perfect woman.
- Huey: What's the problem?
- Granddad: She's too good for me.
- Huey: Is that what she said?
- Granddad: Nooo, she says she likes and accepts me for who I am.
- Huey: So what's the problem?
- Granddad: She doesn't know the real me! No one normal can love the real me. I have to do something drastic before I screw it up. I should try to be someone totally different ... you know, like Tyrese or Chris Brown. And I shouldn't tell her how much I like her. Women like a chase, don't they?
- Riley: Yuuup.
- Granddad: Soon as she thinks she got me, she's gon' move on ...
- Huey: Granddad, this is silly. She obviously likes you. Just relax and be yourself.
- Granddad: Myself? Nah, that'll never work.
Priest: …well, you should definitely see The Passion. It’s a VERY important movie.
Huey: Couldn’t see it. White Jesus.
Priest: …excuse me?
Huey: C’mon man… it’s supposed to be all historically accurate, and they still have a white man playing Jesus? That’s some ol’ BULLSHIT.
Priest: …young man, you speak so well!
“Is this it? This is what I got all those ass-whoopings for? I had a dream once. It was a dream that little black boys and little black girls would drink from the river of prosperity, freed from the thirst of oppression. But lo’ and behold, some four decades later, what have I found but a bunch of trifling, shiftless, good-for-nothing niggas; and I know you some of you don’t want to hear me say that word. It’s the ugliest word in the English language. But that’s what I see now — niggas. And you don’t want to be a nigga. Because niggas are living contradictions. Niggas are full of unfulfilled ambitions! Niggas wax and wane, niggas love to complain, niggas love to hear themselves talk but hate to explain! Niggas love being another man’s judge and jury! Niggas procrastinate until it’s time to worry! Niggas love to be late! Niggas hate to hurry … I’ve seen what’s around the corner! I’ve seen what’s over the horizon and I promise you, you niggas have nothing to celebrate! And no, I won’t get there with you- I’m going to Canada.”
Blood pressure got you down?
Ask your doctor if Zortafrinex is right for you! In clinical trials Zortafrinex was proven to lower blood pressure. Ask your doctor before taking Zortafrinex. Women, pregnant women, and most men should not take Zortafrinex. Known side effects include: Dry-mouth, upset stomach, mild death, blindness, massive heart attack, difficulty breathing, and erectile fungus. Almost all men who took Zortafrinex experienced a severe loss in sexual performance. This is normal. Please stop taking Zortafrinex immediately if you feel mild discomfort, on or in testicles, as this could be a sign of a rare and extremely unpleasant side-effect known as “Total Scrotal Implosion”. If Total Scrotal Implosion should occur, call your doctor right away. If you can not move or talk due to the debilitating pain of Total Scrotal Implosion, please have a loved one call your doctor. There is no cure for Total Scrotal Implosion.
Zortafrinex, always the right choice!
I’m sick of women singing about broke men, sick of men singing about loose women, sick of award shows, sick of name-brand clothes… From this moment on, I stand as the antithesis of Black popular culture! I am the Anti-Cool! I hereby declare myself… A NERD!
- Huey Freeman
And then you know what they did? Made nerds cool.